Thursday, January 11, 2007

Are you sure Famocide isn't legal?

That old adage that you can choose your friends but not your family has a certain, hmmm, truth about it doesn't it.

Disclaimer: I adore my family - all of them, but there are some, well, issues.

For instance, when one goes to visit one's sister, brother-in-law and nieces for a few days after Christmas, that in no way implies that it is OK to unleash 2 year olds on one at 5.30 every morning. Especially 2 year olds who ask whether one is awake while sitting on one's chest hitting one's forehead. 2 year olds who seem to have been told to seek permission to play with one's puppies (that is not a euphemism you sick bastards, I took the dogs with me) at that ungodly hour. The puppies are wide awake in the backyard after the infant tornado has snaked through the house, I don't care what she does with the puppies that early as long as they are still breathing and have no visible scars.

Problem is, said 2 year old (there is only one, despite the feeling that there was a tag team of the little buggers - there is a 6 year old, but she is waay too clever and is happy to stay in bed while someone else takes the heat) always manage to be so damn cute and excited to see you that it is tricky to stay pissed off at them for waking you up so early on your 'holiday'. So instead you just stay pissed off at the world in general, which has always worked for me.

The following set of statements, made on the 2.5 hour car trip from Canberra to Mollymook with niece, from anyone else would have led to me reliving Rainman as Tom Cruise (and in case you were wondering, I wouldn't want to be Tom Cruise even for the chance to shag Katie Holmes - actually, how quickly could I beam out of Tom's life afterwards?):

"[giggling] Loki is sitting next to me"
"[giggling] Loki is licking my hand"
"[giggling] Loki is having a sleep"
"[giggling] Loki is a good girl - she is a tiny puppy"
"[giggling] Loki is awake"...

You get the idea. Bear in mind that this was an excerpt of about 45 seconds of that trip. Imagine that commentary repeated over 2.5 hours. Mind you, the comments were often mixed around a bit, so I don't know what I am complaining about.

So when one escapes back to one's own bed, with at least a day or 2 before returning to work for catching up on things like sleeping in and drinking, why is it that you even miss the little buggers?

13 Comments:

At 9:45 am, Blogger W said...

Hehehe. I like her style.

How much gin did you drink when you got home?

 
At 11:56 pm, Anonymous SouthernBelle said...

awww.... that just warms the cockles of one's heart...

glad to see you back on the blog.

how did on the wagon go for you?

 
At 12:00 am, Blogger Original Mel said...

Wagon schmagon.

You miss them because they are cute... in a reminiscing kind of way. In real life they are, well, possibly a little demanding. Maybe?

Other people's kids are great because, at the end of the day, you can give them back. Your own are ALWAYS there. So I hear.

 
At 10:57 am, Blogger WJ said...

on the wagon was an interesting stopover on the way to getting off the wagon again.

Which is why I drank several gins when I got home - in fact I came home specifically to catch up with a mate from o/s who was in town, so drank with him.

The best thing about missing them is that it means they aren't there all the time...

 
At 7:13 pm, Blogger Steph said...

You have been stalked. Nice blog.

 
At 2:40 am, Blogger jali said...

Gin.

I had a collision with a bottle of Bombay over the weekend. The Bombay won.

Like your blog - got the link from Steph (my idol).

 
At 8:43 am, Blogger WJ said...

Thanks Steph - I'm a lazy barstid but am trying to find some motivation to be regular like you, and not in an unprocessed bran kinda way.

Cheers Jali. We should learn that we never win with those collisions. And I can't afford the insurance...

 
At 9:00 pm, Blogger JahTeh said...

Wandered over from Steph's too and coincidence, another reference to Bombay Sapphire which I tasted for the first time last Sunday. Smoooooth with lemon.

 
At 1:48 am, Blogger it's the little things said...

I wandered over from Steph's blog as well, and glad I did.
I enjoyed your posts on the nieces. I've learned to say to my children, "You have one more minute to talk, then you must be silent for five minutes straight." Otherwise, I'd surely be more insane than I already am.

 
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