Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Things Are Looking Up

I have had an epiphany, of sorts. I have realised it is mid September, which means that life is taking a turn for the better. Let me explain why:
  1. The days are getting warmer and longer. It is therefore a matter of mere weeks, if that, before the daily tradition of wandering up to the park after work with several beers resumes. Sitting in the twilight with a bunch of friends as the mutts run amok/ sweet talk* picnickers and killing a few coldies (that last bit is me, not the dogs) is absolutely THE best way to wind down after a day at work.
  2. Feastability - the Newtown food and wine festival - is on this Sunday. A day of sitting in the sun, eating too much yummy food and drinking too much. Then somehow transporting myself to basketball and either playing completely out of my skin or out of my tree, one of the two.
  3. Oktoberfest. Yes, in September - don't ask me, they are German after all. Sure, efficient - whatever. Get the month right. Anyway, the only thing better than friends having Oktoberfest parties, complete with a plethora of wurst, is going to the Concordia Club. A former bowling club, mere metres from Tempe station. Not much beats chowing down on a pork knuckle in a giant tent on a bowling green and shooting vile corn schnapps. What I want to know is, how big are the hands of those freakin German pigs, and who thought of making corn schnapps? OK, I can understand it is probably an old, old recipe with the schnapps, but, er, people have now invented alcohol that actually tastes ok. German people, are you listening? Hallo? Keine schnapps bitte!
  4. Last long weekend before Christmas. Suck it up guys. Oh, and it is my birthday too, which is sadly an increasingly numerically irrelevant excuse to have a few drinks.
  5. My house is no longer like an icebox when I get home. Just threw that one in there as it has nothing to do with drinking, and I don't want anyone implying there was a pattern emerging.
  6. Newtown Festival is only a month away. A day of sitting in the sun... er, eating too much yummy food...... um, ... drinking maybe too much... and bands playing. That's right, there are bands and all that. phew.

I love September...

*"Sweet talking" usually happens when said mutts realise picnickers have a cold chicken, cheese platter, packet of chips, Ok, any old damn bit of vaguely edible stuff. It MAY involve sitting up like the epitomy of well-behaved dogness, in the hope that picnickers will throw the whole damn chook your way. Failing this, continue to sit up, but with an obviously increasing degree of difficulty as the excitement of uneaten poultry causes barely contained oscillation of the muscular tissue. If this doesn't work, circle around the picnic blanket hoping another picnicker will drop a plate full of salami. Most importantly, be aware of the location of your owner at all times, as getting caught begging means getting seriously busted and pinned on the ground while all your mates dance around doing the canine equivalent of pointing and sniggering while chanting "You're in trouble. You're in trouble". Hey, at least they don't actually nick the food. Almost never.

30 Comments:

At 2:25 pm, Blogger Mex said...

why does the fun stuff ALWAYS happen on a Sunday???

 
At 2:39 pm, Blogger WJ said...

It is a bit like that, isn't it. It bums me too, cos it is

1. a school night; and
2. I have to play basketball;

which mean getting not quite as drunk as I would otherwise like. Damn them.

 
At 3:30 pm, Blogger Original Mel said...

Fun stuff happens on a Sunday to make it seem more naughty... you know you shouldn't drink that extra bottle of wine, but you do anyway, and feel like a naughty school girl until you have to drag your arse from bed the next day to go to a job you hate...

 
At 3:42 pm, Blogger WJ said...

I do love that naughty schoolgirl feeling, I must say. Could have something to do with that old saying.. what was it... oh yes "You are only as old as the naughty schoolgirl you feel". Or something like that.

 
At 9:33 am, Blogger fingers said...

Another blog that doesn't update unless I 'refresh'.
Anyway...sounds like a super time to be an Inner Westie, what with the 'Doner Kebab Festival', the 'Second-hand Furniture Expo' and 'Black Jeans Day' coming up.
Have I missed anything...

 
At 10:08 am, Blogger WJ said...

Lots of things fingers.

There is the Emo magic seminars "No, I'm not a Goth. No I'm not a punk... open up my sleeves, hey presto...".

Also the "Maintain your microbiology - Dreads and you" workshops.

Not to mention the "Goth Babies Don't Get Hot In Black" series.

See what you are missing...

 
At 10:58 am, Blogger Original Mel said...

You forgot the metal work series, imginatively titled "How many facial piercings are too many?", and "Is that a nipple ring or are you just excited to see me?"

 
At 11:18 am, Blogger Mex said...

at least its not the "Bogans with Money - how to blend" seminars that you get over in the East.

 
At 11:43 am, Blogger Original Mel said...

I think over in the east they concentrate more on the "Shopping for Success - Does my fake Gucci look fake enough to be real or too real so everyone will know it's fake?"

 
At 11:48 am, Blogger fingers said...

Oh look...it's Cuntsville's answer to 'Kath and Kim'.
'Mex and Mel; the bag ladies from hell'...

 
At 11:50 am, Blogger WJ said...

Not to mention the "Vespas - Cunt Point as Little Italy" or "Masculinity in The East - you don't need to prove ANYTHING" program - very popular I understand...

 
At 11:56 am, Blogger fingers said...

Good one Todd.
Are your pugs on the float at the 'Gay Dog Mardi Gras' again this year...

 
At 12:01 pm, Blogger Mex said...

or the universal "how to imply that your suburb of choice is better than everywhere else by making personal sledges against others".

 
At 12:08 pm, Blogger Original Mel said...

I don't know if imply is the correct word, Mex. "Imply" indicates some subtlety is involved. More than that of a sledgehammer, in any event.

 
At 4:37 am, Anonymous SouthernBelle said...

wj you would love working for a magazine, we get invited to all kinds of things with free nibblies & grog, including a Laurent-Perrier champers tasting... ok that one was not free, but most of them are.

and our boss took us out for seafood lunch the other day, I ate snow-crab legs and (crumbed, fried) sea scallops - sooooooo good.

 
At 9:52 am, Blogger Mountjoy said...

As opposed to "land scallops", AJ?!

 
At 9:54 am, Blogger WJ said...

Hmmm, 'land scallops' sounds like a Fingers euphemism waiting to happen...

 
At 6:53 pm, Blogger welcome to wallyworld said...

This fucking Musical Blogs is sending me round the twist. I can't keep up. Why don't we merge them all into one? You finding Radar pretty boring these days BTW? I reckon when we had the run of the place it was much more lively. And don't get me started on Jack Marx's pile of shit. His latest post is "Let's make fun of people's surnames". "Raper" aint that funny anyway. I had a girlfriend with the surname "Organ" and another with "Ramsbottom". Try living with that. Or my old school chums Peter Ness and Andrew Ness who had to suffer being called from the roll every day by "P. Ness" and A. Ness".

 
At 11:02 pm, Anonymous SouthernBelle said...

as opposed to potato scallops, silly boys!

: )

*drools at the memory*

 
At 9:23 am, Blogger WJ said...

But I'm not opposed to potato scallops at all, Belle. They are quite yummy in a hangover-solving-but-otherwise-almost-stomach-churningly-greasy kind of way...

 
At 2:58 pm, Blogger Mountjoy said...

Ah, the sophisticated 70's...

Mountjoy, sub-teens, on a "driving holiday" sydney - adelaide - melbourne - sydney one school hols. Got to Portland and was having fish & Chips for lunch. Asked The Countess if we could have some scallops - and they were added to the order. Much to my horror, they were aforemntioned "sea scallops" complete with "roe on". Tossed those vile fuckers away in disgust. 30 years on they'd be looked at as manna from heaven and not only would lady m fight me for them, but Heir and Spare would have thier hands up too...

 
At 2:59 pm, Blogger Mountjoy said...

I so have spelling issues when I type in a hurry....

 
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ولانها الشركة الرائدة والمشهود لها بالكفائه العاليه بما فعلته من

انجازات فى اعمال التنظيفالجاد بافضل وسائل التنظيف الحديثه والمعدات المتطوره فى تنظيف

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مستوى بتنظيف الشقه بدون التسبب بأى إزعاج للعميل فلا تتباطؤ فى إختيار شركة الكمال

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